Anyone who knows me knows I’m someone to ask about fashion. (I’ll leave that to you to decide whether I’m being sarcastic.) What’s not to love about spring? The sun is out—unless you live in Colorado, in which case it snowed for the past 24 hours. The living is good—unless your house has just been foreclosed. And everyone knows that the best way to fix the economy is to shop until your credit cards are maxed out—unless they already are, in which case I highly recommend hosting a clothing swap party, i.e. a shindig where everyone bring clothes, everyone tries stuff on, and everyone is honest about whether you can really pull it off. I just went to one, it was fabulous. Otherwise:
Yeah, apparently these are back in style. Not only for the 22 year old frat boy this time, folks! No matter that they are baggy and overall pretty shapeless. Some perks: they’re long enough that you could wear them to work, if you’re workplace is casual. They’re airy, so if you’re a thigh sweater, you’re in luck. Finally, if your brother still has pants from his teenage years—you know, the huge ones steeped in the irony of being the pants most in need of a belt but never worn in one—you can always swipe a pair and cut them off at the appropriate length.
Many things vaguely French
Something about springtime seems to make Americans wish they were in Paris, sipping espresso and out-dressing all the thin Parisian women. Unfortunately, that would never happen, at least not the out-dressing part. Fortunately, it does mean that your blue-and-white striped shirts, little cardigans, and vintage-cut sundresses are that much more chic.
With the vaguely French comes the blatantly pastel clothing. I have mixed feelings about this. A pastel palette is much like chocolate molds. If your materials are high in taste, quality, and moderation, the result is unique and beautiful; if you overdo it, the result looks like Easter puked on it. Careful, there.
As with anything labeled “modern,” modern floral has an edge. Basically flowers that are shouting at you. Not for the faint of heart or the shy of wardrobe. So I personally quite like it.
Anything that looks like someone painted it
Got a Monet rip-off shirt? How about a dress that looks like someone flung paint at it and then washed it roughly? This is the time of year to bust out anything that looks like the designer had a painter in mind. Honestly, it doesn’t even matter if the clothing is hideous; people will just think you’re being ironic, daring, and a bit of a hipster. “Ugly sundress” is the new “ugly sweater.”
That’s right, people! It’s still okay for you to wear leggings as pants. I think. And if you’re worried, buying leggings in print is not only the new fashion wave in barely-clothing, it’s also safer: much harder to see through your dungarees when they’ve got a loud print on them.
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